Narcissism
Narcissism exists on a spectrum. Everyone has narcissistic tendencies, narcissism is not a flaw in and of itself.
What constitutes a dangerous and self-serving trait, a pathology, or even a personality disorder, is when narcissism has been developed as an extreme coping trait: Viewing the world and others as objects meant to serve the ego.
If narcissism has developed as an extreme trait, we can be dealing with someone who has a personality disorder called "Narcissistic personality disorder". This disorder is extreme, hard to heal, fairly rare, and does incredible damage to its victims.
Narcissism versus personality disorder
Most narcissists you will meet will not be NPD. Most narcissists are people who have wounds and traumas which they coped with by developing narcissistic traits. They're damaging and abusive to be around, but they are not necessarily what we would call malignant or fully disordered.
A lot of people have some narcissistic traits but are also people who are able to experience love, empathy and care. Narcissism becomes a problem when the self-serving agenda, coupled with the lack of empathy, becomes a main trait and starts using and discarding people.
People with high covert narcissism are the most difficult to identify as they have abusive and toxic traits, but can also be genuinely kind at times which creates a high tendency to experience cognitive dissonance.
Diagnosing
Your best bet is not to focus on diagnosing someone, but more so diagnosing behaviours that are unsafe, such as someone being emotionally/verbally/physically abusive toward you, someone who disregards your boundaries, and so forth. Whether someone is a narcissist, malignant or not, disordered or not, identifying harmful behaviours and setting and upholding boundaries is the best and only way to protect yourself against harm.
That being said, for the sake of Astrology research and curiosity, here are my thoughts on Narcissism and how to spot it in a chart.
What are the symptoms of narcissism?
Everyone is a narcissist to some degree, and it is absolutely healthy and normal to love yourself; but if you are the victim of a NPD, you'll recognize a lot of the symptoms below:
Inflated sense of self: The person believes they should be treated with special care everywhere they go. Arrogance and condescendence are witnessed every day. They may create scenes and display bursts out of rage if they do not get treated with special care. Narcissistic rage is explosive and unpredictable. The overt narcissist is obvious, but the covert narcissist might appear to be shy, repressed and humble. However, if you trigger their wound/ego/narcissistic rage, you will find that they display their inflated sense of self.
Delusions of grandeur: Believe they will achieve grandiose things without the proper means or will. Everyone has dreams that can be grandiose, but the narcissist will consistently display perceptions of self and perceptions of their future that is in no way congruent with their path, abilities, skills, or motivation.
Need praise and admiration: Constantly need to be reassured of their value, will turn into states of rage if not praised. The covert narcissist will appear needy and you might confuse that neediness for someone who really wants to make sure you love them because they're so into you. But don't get fooled - it's about them, their ego, their need for narcissistic supply. Nothing else.
Entitlement: They should get everything they want right away and as they want, just because they asked for it. If the NPD is in your family, they will use their title (mother, father) to get what they want out of you, without treating you with kindness or care. If it's a partner, they will always consider that they deserve everything they ask without having to treat you in any way. You will find them in out of control state of rage is someone does not treat them as they want (people in the service industry in particular, but also coworker, employees, family, friends, strangers) Again, the covert narcissist might employ covert means to get what they want. For example, they might be doing a lot of favours for you (usually favours that also benefit them in some way), but you will find that these favours come with unspoken yet very clear expectations. When the covert narcissist has demands, no matter how unsound or exaggerated, you will be expected to comply and you will be expected to have no boundaries.
Lack of empathy: Every single person around them is considered a tool or product, and they will use, seduce, hurt, love, with the only goal to obtain something out of you. They do not consider or understand your feelings, you are only existing to serve them in some way.
Bullying: They will maintain their sense of inflated sense by putting you down, patronizing you, bullying, harassing, and dismissing your feelings and reality.
Compulsive lying: In fact, you'll notice that they bend reality to fit their desires/needs, which creates extreme confusion. As the lies are, at first, subtle, you might not notice. They also tend to compartmentalize their life with each audience having a different version of reality. Divide and conquer.
Narcissism in Astrology: Markers in the birth chart
There is not one aspect or one sign, planet, that can be associated with such mental disorder. However, you're looking at some clues added with each other. Do not forget that, two persons can have the exact same chart, and have different levels of consciousness, different evolutionary journeys. Do not use these clues to condemn people you do not know, only use it to confirm an experience with someone you know and give yourself the validation needed to walk away or to fulfill your astrological curiosity.
Wounded ego
The narcissist has been wounded in their ego. Whether it's because the parents completely annihilated their sense of self by destroying it, or because they were the golden child who was constantly praised, adored, cajoled, in both cases the narcissist developed a sense of self that was incongruent with reality.
Callousness & manipulation
As well, the narcissist considers that their ego desires supersede everything else and everyone else, so we must find signs of callousness (Pluto) and a sign that they will conceal or manipulate others through their actions (Neptune/Pluto).
In order to go about their ego agendas with their callousness, they must be able to completely disregard other people's welfare and justify to themselves the harm they do. They must either have no care for other people, or they must be so dissociated from their emotions that they do not experience guilt, remorse, empathy, like the rest of us do.
- Signs of a wounded ego/sense of self: Neptune/Sun, Pluto/Sun, Jupiter/Sun, Chiron/Sun. - Incongruency between self and reality: Strong Neptune. Neptune can be in challenging aspect to Jupiter very often. - Callousness: Strong Pluto. There's no way around it. Usually, Pluto will aspect Sun or Mars. - Conceal or manipulate: Again here we're looking at someone with a strongly challenged Neptune or Mars. Pluto/Mars is typical, Neptune/Mars can be as well. The narcissist will be more so - Lack of empathy: Moon is afflicted. Typically you will find Moon in aspect with Mars, or Moon in aspect with Saturn or Uranus. You might also find an afflicted Venus as one must also have a skewed value system to go about their narcissistic agenda. - Mythology: The myth of narcissus and echo seems to resonate with my experience. I have pulled the asteroids Narcissus (37117) and Echo (60) in the birth charts of known narcissists and although it did not work for all of them, I did find a high prevalence of them who had Narcissus conjunct Echo, opposite Echo, or square Echo. I also checked in the charts of people who do not have narcissistic traits, and I did not find these two in aspect, which reaffirms my theory that although not all narcissist have these two in aspects, it looks like a lot of people who do have these in aspect are narcissistic :) - Lies: There is actually an asteroid called Lie, which has been incredibly insightful to use. Pathological liars tend to have a strong Lie in their chart.
Markers for NPD victims in the natal chart
Lack of boundaries: In order to be trapped by a NPD, we need to find a lack of boundaries in the person, and this will be most likely caused by Neptune contacts. If the NPD is in your family, then we will find Neptune in contact to your Sun (father), Moon (mother), Mercury (siblings), possibly in contact to your 4th or 10th House cusp. This shows that you were raised in an environment that did not allow you to build your proper boundaries, and therefore you were exposed from the start to the abuse. I don't work much with Asteroids as I feel we have enough information with the planets, but it is interesting to note that the Asteroid Nessus will often be involved too to one of these sensitive points in the birth chart of the victim.
If the NPD is someone you met later on in life, such as in a relationship, Neptune might affect your Venus, your Moon, your Mars. You should also be able to find a transit corresponding, with Neptune challenging your planets, but the transits only activate a natal potentiality and therefore you need the original lack of boundary.
Nessus: The victim, if it's a prolonged abuse like in childhood or though a marriage partner, would most likely have Nessus in hard aspect to Mercury, Sun, Venus or Moon.
Incapacity to let go: The victim of a NPD holds on too tight to the dream, the projected image that we see through Neptune. Often, Pluto comes in the picture too and shows someone who may perceive the treat represented by the NPD, but does not want to surrender to reality. You will find Pluto challenging personal planets, Sun, Moon, Mars, Moon, Mercury. This is most likely true for the victims who met their NPD later on in life in a friend or partner, this signature does not have to exist if the NPD is a parent or someone in the family.
Empathy: Often the victim is empathetic and stick around despite all the pain associated with a life with a NPD. Empathy will be found with Neptune of course, but also with an overwhelming presence of water planets (Neptune, Moon, Pluto), water houses (4th, 8th, 12th), and water signs (Scorpio, Cancer, Pisces).Neptune in the 1st house or in aspect to the Ascendant is common.
If you are the victim of a NPD, in an overwhelming majority of cases, it is impossible to make them realize or admit anything through communication. They can't help themselves and their trauma is often burried extremely deep. The best way to save yourself is by cutting all communication and running away without turning back. If you do not have the possibility to do that, then you are going to need to establish strict and firm boundaries in order to protect yourself from them. The hardest part of having a NPD in your life is that you will not get closure, you will not get any admission of guilt, and if you do, it means you have been sucked back into it because a NPD does not admit anything without an ulterior motive. A NPD acts, thinks, feels only for their own profit. For more resources on the NPD disorder and how to protect and heal yourself, I recommend reading this and this.
CASE STUDIES OF KNOWN NARCISSISTS
Known narcissist / possible psychopath
Analysis: Sun in Sagittarius inconjunct Jupiter and in the 10th house. Jupiter is opposite Neptune, Jupiter in the 5th house. Here we have someone who desires status, reputation, and has unrealistic dreams of success that will fill up their ego. This person's motivation is to find a sense of status, a sense of recognition. Jupiter inconjunct Sun shows that their inflated ego is in a seesaw, sometimes up, sometimes down, with little regulation.
Pluto conjunct Mars in Scorpio is incredibly powerful and could have been used for good, but in this case it played out as an incredible capacity to be a master manipulator, act in incredibly callous ways, use people as pawns for their ego needs.
This person's Moon is in Sagittarius and in the 11th house, conjunct Mercury. It wouldn't have been a red flag in and of itself, although this is of course a Moon that is detached and prone to intellectualizing, Moon conjunct Dejanira suggests someone who was highly wounded emotionally.
Venus in Capricorn, this person only gets involved with women who enhance their personal status.
This person's chart suggest someone who is highly callous, manipulative, and concerned with dreams of great success. Venus in the 12th house in Capricorn shows the ability to idealize their victims. This chart isn't as damning as the others, I do think this person really chose a path that they could have avoided.
This person's Lie is square Venus and sextile Moon.
Known covert narcissist
Analysis:
Aries rising, Mars in the 5th house, trine Pluto and Mercury. Here we have someone who is incredibly selfish and immaturely focused on self. Their main drive is to get their ego needs met, with little awareness of the cost for other people.
Mars in Cancer trine Pluto gives them a high tendency to be manipulative, play the victim, act coy. Yet, they always get what they want, no matter what the cost for them or for others. Sun is trine Ascendant and Mars.
We have a strong Scorpionic signature with Moon in Scorpio, Pluto conjunct Mercury, Pluto conjunct Sun, Pluto trine Mars, Pluto-Mercury-Sun in the 8th house. Callousness is truly their middle name. No regrets, no remorse, no guilt. Moon is conjunct Nessus and square Saturn, and they are absolutely emotionally abusive and seem unable to practice empathy unless 1/ they have experienced personally the situation the other person is in and 2/ they have a personal interest and benefit to earn by showing empathy.
Chiron is in Leo and square Pluto, which shows the compulsive need for attention and ego supply.
Venus is square Jupiter, conjunct Uranus, conjunct Neptune - all in Capricorn. This is someone who gets involved in short term relationships where they idealize, devalue, discard the person, whenever they can't get what they want anymore. They get involved with women who enhance their personal status and image.
Echo conjunct Narcissus.
Lie square Sun, Lie sextile Nessus and Moon.
Known overt/grandiose narcissist
Analysis:
This one is interesting. With Mars in Leo in the 5th house opposite Saturn in the 11th house, he has a tight group of friends and is very charming, generous and loyal to them. You'd truly believe this is a standup person and the Leo energy truly shines as someone generous and friendly. The Gemini energy definitely reinforces friendliness and openness.
As well, Mercury in Cancer gives a certain degree of emotional intelligence and receptivity that can look very sweet.
Where it gets interesting is when you look at Pluto in the 7th house (a yellow flag in and of itself especially in the chart of a man), square Mars in Leo, square Saturn. This is someone who is domineering, needs control, needs the upper hand, and displays this behaviour specifically in his romantic relationships. Friends might get the Mars in Leo warmth, but Pluto shows up in his one on one relationships.
Pluto is square Mars, trine Mercury and opposite Venus. Pluto square Mars is always worth raising an eyebrow, especially from the 7th house. Opposite Venus shows once again how these behaviours seem to come up mostly in romantic relationships. Notice too how Asteroid Lie is exactly trine Venus. LOTS of pent up anger in this person and a deep feeling of inferiority (Saturn opp Mars) and powerlessness (Pluto square Mars) compensated with a need to show superiority and power. Mercury in Cancer could have been a nice placement to give empathy, but opposite Neptune and Uranus, although this is someone highly intelligent, including emotionally, they tend to use this intelligence to create a false aura of specialness (Neptune 10th house) and create illusions. Gaslighting and projections are unfortunately super common and they're pretty good at it with Pluto trine too. He knows exactly what makes people tick and uses his understanding of psychology and emotions to get the outcome desired. Not a problem in and of itself but couple with Pluto energy, does get dangerous.
Moon is not well placed in Gemini but it doesn't actually receive negative aspects. It is square Lie, but here it's not so much someone who completely lacks empathy, more so someone who is hell-bent on having control at all cost and creating this illusion (Neptune) of specialness.
This is an interesting example as it shows a different root for the narcissistic distortion.
Recommended reads on narcissism: