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Pluto in synastry: Obsession, bonding, and all that jazz

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Pluto is quite the mystifying planet and relationships that have a lot of Pluto can be quite mind-wrecking. In this post we will dive into what Pluto is, what role it plays in the birth chart, how it affects relationships when it is in aspect to a partner's planets, what a Plutonian relationship is, and who feels what when it comes to synastry.


Pluto symbolizes power, transformation, regeneration and rebirth.

Pluto is associated with the unknown, darkness, and the subconscious mind, as it embodies both of the above. Pluto represents what we do not know and therefore often fear. It represents what we are powerless in the face of (hard to have power over what is unknown) and yet it also represents what we have power over: Ourselves. Mastering Pluto energy means gaining dominion over yourself by uncovering all your dark corners. By gaining complete awareness and mastery over yourself, as much as the unknown remains unknown, you can rest assured power is in your hands.

Pluto in the birth chart

Pluto in the birth chart represents where we can have a blind spot, it can represent where we feel compulsive, where we seek power without realizing it, it can represent where we have destructive tendencies (when we are unaware) and where we can accumulate influence and power (when we are aware).

For example, Pluto located in the 7th house of the birth chart means that you can find yourself repeatedly in relationships that are painful and abusive, that you choose partners with dark personality traits, relationships where you lose your power and feel compelled to stay nonetheless. If your Pluto is integrated, you can be in relationships that are intense, passionate and incredibly bonded, and surely power dynamics are at play, but it can be to your advantage and for the best. After all, power is not a negative word when used consciously.

Pluto in synastry

A lot is written about Pluto in synastry and for good reasons: When someone's Pluto is in aspect to your planets, and vis versa, a powerful obsessive bond is created between the two partners. So who feels what, and is it a good sign or a bad one? Is it a karmic partner?

Before we can answer these questions seriously, we must refocus on what Pluto is. It is our subconscious, our desire for power, and our potential dark spots, where we might be acting out of unconsciousness. Each person carries their Pluto differently, meaning that some people have done the shadow-work of understanding their blind spots and destructive or compulsive tendencies, while others are not at this stage. It is virtually impossible to tell just from the birth chart as it only describes tendencies and inclinations, while everyone can choose the hard path of transmuting their shadow. Of course, the more Plutonian you are, the more work is required.

What Pluto feels in synastry

When someone's planet touches your Pluto in synastry, they are illuminating that part of you. They're activating your shadow, your thirst for power, your lack of power, your destructive tendencies, and your obsessive tendencies. If you haven't done the work of transmuting Pluto, this can be a recipe for disaster. But if you have, the Pluto person feels incredibly drawn and obsessed with the planet person, as on a subconscious level, Pluto feels that the planet person has the potential to help them understand themselves at a deeper level and transform.

Pluto feels incredibly attached to the Pluto person and has the desire to bond with them. It can feel intoxicating and obsessive to Pluto. This is all happening at a subconscious level, more often than not, but the Pluto person feels like they MUST have the planet person to themselves. It can create devotion and a deep desire for bonding.

Once again, it truly depends on how mature and introspective the Pluto person is. The obsessive and primal nature of the interaction can make the Pluto person deeply afraid of losing the planet person, leading to strategies of control and power struggles. It doesn't have to be, if both partners can be vulnerable enough and aware enough to express the underlying pattern at play.

Pluto feels empowered or disempowered by the planet person, once again depending on their relationship to their own subconscious, but in any case, they feel obsessed by the planet person.

What the planet person feels in synastry

The planet person feels entirely magnetized and mesmerised by the Pluto person, who is seen as a powerful figure one cannot stay away from. The planet person sees the power and influence of the Pluto person. Perhaps no one around really understand why the planet person is so attracted to the Pluto person, but the planet person is under the spell of the Pluto person who just seems so electrifying and powerful. If the planet person is disposed to be attracted to power or disposed to intensity (like a Plutonian would for example or someone with Scorpio placements) they can feel like a moth to a flame, unable to walk away and unable to understand why the spell is so powerful. But if the planet person is a more timid person or someone who cannot really deal with intensity and power, they might feel scared of the Pluto person, trying to distance themselves or trying to guard themselves against them. Pluto tends to have an extreme effect on people, creating obsession or repulsion, and sometimes, the obsession scares the person away, leading them to take their distance.

The planet person can also feel that the Pluto person has the potential of overpowering them, having too much influence on them, and it's not uncommon that the planet person reports feeling suffocated or invaded, without any particular action from the Pluto person. There can be a fear of the power that is perceived in the Pluto person.

The planet person also sees the shadow of the Pluto person, as if they had an unparalleled ability to see their subconscious, in ways no one else does. This can feel scary to both partners, unless they have established a deeply secure bond, where both feel comfortable to bare it all.

See also:

Pluto in synastry: Examples

Pluto - Sun in synastry: Examples

Pluto trine Sun is a really common aspect in synastry, probably because the Sun person sees the power of the Pluto person, and the Pluto person feels obsessed enough with the Sun person. I've seen it quite often in synastry where Pluto is the male partner and Sun the female partner. I myself had an interesting dynamic with a male friend whose Sun was exactly square my Pluto. He was constantly feeling threatened and invaded by me while I never did anything to provoke it nor is this a pattern I ever encountered truly in relationships, and he spoke often of my "shadow", accusing me of being secretive, strategic or obsessed with power - when I wasn't. Our relationship was never obsessive nor romantic and the only Pluto aspect between us was Pluto square Sun, which I think ultimately lead us apart as I grew tired of being accused and he grew tired of feeling guarded and suspicious around me (his words!)

See also:

Pluto - Moon in synastry: Examples

I've seen a lot of synastry with Pluto-Moon in aspect in all shapes and forms, and it seems it is actually the one aspect that fares the best. It seems to create a powerful bond with lots of intimacy and vulnerability, if the two partners can live up to the challenge.

I've seen a few synastry with Pluto opposite Moon. Pluto feels incredibly attached to the Moon person and feels like they need them, that they will "die" without them. If the relationship is otherwise healthy, it does tend to create a powerful attachment which can be a lifeline for the relationship to survive decades. The Moon person feels like a moth to a flame to the Pluto person, who is seen as a powerful figure of attachment. If the Moon person has attachment anxieties and lean towards avoidance for example, that can be too much to bear and cause the Moon person to withdraw. I've experienced it myself with the opposition.

The conjunction has been surprisingly positive in my experience. I've had a long-term relationship myself where both our Moon where conjunct the other person's Pluto (his Moon in Scorpio conjunct my Pluto in Scorpio and my Moon in Libra conjunct his Pluto in Scorpio) and it was an incredibly bonded and intimate relationship. I wouldn't say we were afraid of losing each other, but we were also quite bonded to one another. When I chose to leave, it took me a really long time to do so as the bond felt so hard to severe. While the relationship was otherwise healthy, it wasn't what I was looking for long-term and I think the Pluto-Moon double conjunction accounted for the difficulty in leaving.

Pluto - Venus in synastry

I've also seen this one time and time again in synastry, although surprisingly, not that often in long-standing relationships. I have a close friend whose Pluto is conjunct his wife Venus, and he met her when transiting Pluto was conjunct his Venus (a common occurence: We tend to meet people who carry in their birth chart the transit we're currently going through, or we meet people with who we have in synastry the transit we're currently experiencing!)

He (Pluto) was immediately and irrevocably obsessed with her (Venus). It does help that Saturn also is conjunct her Venus, which helped concretize the bond into a tangible and long-term bond. Pluto wants to own Venus and is obsessed with her, and if Venus isn't scared by the intensity and power of the Pluto person, it can make for an intoxicating relationship.

More often than not though, Venus can feel intimidated by Pluto and can feel like she'll lose all her power and agency under Pluto's power. I happened to have a double Venus-Pluto aspect in synastry with someone, where his Venus was conjunct my Pluto and my Venus was square his Pluto. It was an instant fireworks show, and we were instantly bonded, instantly obsessed with one another. But quickly enough, I felt (Venus) that his shadow was overwhelming and that I couldn't trust him (Pluto). Just like my friend whose Sun square my Pluto felt I was all those dark things, I felt the same way about him. He on the other hand, with his Venus conjunct my Pluto, told me when we ended things that he felt suffocated by me, and that I was trying to overpowering him. In hindsight, I felt this was a perfect representation of the double Venus-Pluto aspect at play!


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7 days ago
Rated 5 out of 5 stars.

So good!


May 15
Rated 5 out of 5 stars.


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